Comments Overheard Following the Holyfield/Tyson Fight

1. Take the bite out of crime: Reincarnate Mike
2. He took the easy way out. I question his courage. He should be out of boxing. Maybe he could get a job as a mascot for Tyson's Chicken Company.
3. Yeah, how about these Tyson frozen dinners: Ears Holyfield, Evander Eartouffee, Evander, the Other Dark Meat.
4. Even in prison, Tyson could never get that thing down. It was supposed to be just a nibble at the ear, not a full-fledged bite.
5. At least by spitting out the ear, he followed Dahmer Rules of Cannibalistic Etiquette: Only the lobe is considered a delicacy. Any other part of the ear can—and should—be expectorated.
6. Jordan's made millions with his Air Jordan shoes. How about Ear Holyfield caps, a baseball cap with upper ear attachments on both sides.
7. Maybe Tyson should just eat a light lunch a few hours before a fight.
8. Hey, I got an idea for Tyson's next fight: A World Championship Bite To The Finish between Mike the Mad Masticator and Marv the Munching Molester Albert?
9. Holyfield plainly brought on himself. I clearly heard him say during the clinches, "Bite me, you fat little bastard."
10. So, he bit him on the ear. At least he wasn't biting below the belt.
11. Most frightening implication from the fight: Tyson announcing he had children.
12. I wonder how may transplants Robin Givens has had?
13. It's obvious Tyson bit off more than he could chew.
14. First fan: Come on Holyfield, beat the bastard's brains out.
Second fan: Come on Mike, break the chicken-shit's ribs! Knock his guts out!
First fan: You got him Mike, go for the head, kill the asshole!
Second fan: Hey, did you see that? That animal Tyson just bit his ear. He's gotta be disqualified. What's this sport coming to?